Monday, July 19, 2010

Buster Poindexter Can Suck It

It is damn hot in Utah right now.

Yes, I know, east coasters, it's a "dry heat." Nothing can compare to the misery you are enduring with the heat AND humidity. You should all be given medals. I mean that. However, I listen to you bitch when you have two inches of snow on the ground, and have been out of work for three weeks because of it, when I only am excused from work when even a dog team can't get me there, so I think listening to me complain about the "dry heat" is a fair trade. Oh, and you can buy wine in the grocery store, so shut it.

Our house is extremely small. We have a swamp cooler, and a ceiling fan, and a small fan in the living room. Despite all this, no air is moving. The only ten feet of the house that are cool are those directly in front the cooling sources. I would like to blame it on mechanical problems, but all are working perfectly.

We have taken to eating large amounts of popsicles and ice cream, mostly because the idea of cooking anything makes us all want to go on strike. The fact that I am eating ice cream just proves how hot it is. I do not eat ice cream. I spend my calories on wine. Yet, because of this heat I made Ryan take me to get a Butterfinger shake yesterday. I ate it all. And then I felt dirty.

Meg seems to be taking the heat in stride, mostly because she LOVES the water. She is happy at the community pool. She is happy in the kiddie pool. She is happy playing in the sprinkler or the hose. She is happy with the spray bottle. As long as she is around water, she is smiling. Even when it's just water from a water bottle...



Of course she's keeping cool, half of the water is going down her shirt. It would be annoying, but I will admit that the times I have been the recipient of the splatter it has been quite refreshing.

I can hardly wait to complain about winter again. I am even looking forward to listening to the east coasters complain about it too.

Yeah, it's that hot.

22 comments:

Amanda said...

Can we discuss your daughter's new Ernie/Snidely Whiplash/Muttley laugh? It is too precious.

Anonymous said...

Swamp cooler? No idea what that is. In Texas it's hot and humid, too, but this year's been a dream compared to last year's heat wave of misery. Is Meg a Pisces? I vaguely remember reading something about that? Or is this the right blog? Anyway, if so, that explains her love of the water. That, or the miserable heat and her extremely high intelligence. :)

Unknown said...

You and Meg need to have a mommy/daughter day in the wading pool. It'll be fun and cooling!

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

Not all of us can buy wine in the supermarket. And seriously, this heat, it's not so bad. We have it for 6 months out of the year. We still complain from time to time but we figured out how to use the AC to our advantage.

Michelle @Flying Giggles said...

Sounds miserable! My parents do not have AC and I was at their house last weekend, so humid!

I am not sure how a blended wine drink would be, but maybe you can start making Margaritas?

Unknown said...

You're right. People from places like Texas (me!) always talk about the humidity & how we wish it was a "dry" heat we were feeling. Shuttin' it now! I like how you just lay the ground rules FAST on your blog.

G. B. Miller said...

If it helps, over the weekend I had the song "Run, Run Rudolph" going through my head.

And no, I don't complain about winter nor do I get stuck at home from work for three weeks. I just suck it up and enjoy all the little people who lived in this state for two decades or so and still don't know how to drive when there's snow on the ground.

Heat is heat, but wet heat is the worst.

Badass Geek said...

Dry heat or not, when it's hot out, it effing sucks. From my third floor apartment where all the heat rises to, I feel your pain.

Leslie said...

what is a swamp cooler? Meg is as cutie pie as usual!

Anonymous said...

She is adorable!!

Melting on this side of the world too...

Mandy_Fish said...

We don't have air conditioning either. Ugh. We've gotten three bids on it though, I just want the husband to make a decision and pump some freon-scented air into this hothouse!

You and the husband are the only two people I've ever heard mention a "swamp cooler." He grew up in Fresno. Maybe it's a west side of the country thing?

BugginWord said...

I have those little plastic ice rectangle things that go in coolers inside my bra. Square boobs are in.

Three Cats and a Baby said...

I never complain about winter. Even when I am shoveling the driveway for hours just to go back and do it again later that day, I stop and think about how much I hate summer and I don't complain. That's how much I hate summer.

Although being in water does make it worth it sometimes. I am with Meg on that one.

Love the video.

Sometimes when I am having a bad day, I come here and look at your daughter. Thank you for that.

Kelly said...

I'd much rather be cold then hot. At least if you are cold you can put on a hoodie. If you are too hot, there are only so many clothes you can take off before the police are called.

Unknown said...

Yeah... it's hotter than a sonofabitch here too. I think I'm going to take on Meg's way of cooling down. You think my coworkers will look at me funny.

Anonymous said...

I'd still move because of that wine thing....LOVE Meg!

Heather said...

God, I'm hot just reading about your heat. There is nothing worse than the flipping heat. You can only take off so much clothes before it's illegal to leave the house. Even licker doesn't taste good when it's that hot.

Ice in the bathtub, with a fan blowing the cold air reflected onto your nekkid body laying on the cool tile. That's all that works.

Ca88andra said...

I just barely remember what its like to be hot. Down here its winter and I'm freezing. Sometimes I try to remember how hot last summer was in the hope I might feel warm again. Want to swap? Except of course I'm not swapping the fact that I can buy wine at the supermarket!

Missed Periods said...

I feel guilty even commenting. I live in Southern California, so the weather is quite temperate. However, I am probably inhaling smog as I write, so there's that. And, I don't have a valid excuse to eat ice cream.

Kim said...

What the hell is a swamp cooler?

Panting helps.

Jennifer said...

Central AC was literally my only requirement of the new house! I lived without it for one summer in Louisiana.....neveragainmyfriend. Standing with your head in the freezer helps some:)

Rassles said...

My weather IS SO MUCH WORSE THAN YOUR WEATHER. I am also thinking 'bout changing my screen name to One-Upper.