Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Just Keep Digging, Chris

Utah is known s a conservative state. Wait, strike that, I meant an ultra conservative state. Seriously. There are some days that it is illegal to wear blue. This is a place where the good old boys network is considered progressive. It's where minority legislation is rights for brunettes. It's where Liberals are so used to fighting losing battles that when they win they don't know what to do, and usually just end up doing what the conservatives wanted anyway. However, recently one man has gone too far, and actually sparked outrage. Ladies and gentlemen of the Internet, I give you state Senator Chris Buttars...

Isn't he magnificent? Don't you see the rays of light and knowledge just streaming from his eyes? This is the man who recently referred to a bill he didn't like as a "dark, ugly thing," adding (just in case we didn't get it) "this baby is black." And then he wondered why people took offense.

Of course, instantly the NAACP and anyone who doesn't fly a rebel flag over their house started calling for him to step down. He refused. He did kind of apologize though, saying he was sorry if people took offense. That's kind of like saying I'm sorry if anyone doesn't like this blog. I am not apologizing for writing it, just that some people may not have the good sense and well developed sense of humor to appreciate it. So, I think you can understand why the NAACP wasn't ready to kiss and make up just yet.

The next thing he did was plan a rally and begin making t-shirts for people to show their support for him. And he did it all with money from his campaign fund! Now, if that doesn't say "man of the people" I don't know what does. What a Mensch. Wait, I mean "good guy," since he probably wouldn't appreciate the Yiddish.

What a shock it was when people began saying that the idea of a rally was, at best, misguided. And how confused our dear Mr. Buttars must have been when his t-shirts sold fewer than those for Doug Henning's latest world tour. So, he decided to postpone his "Everybody Loves Chris" plan and grant one on one interviews to all of the papers and television stations. There was only one problem, he would be doing all the talking. In one interview he compared to those criticizing him to a "hate lynch mob," and tried to prove he wasn't racist by saying he had worked with "
black kids, red kids, brown kids" at the Youth Corrections Ranch he started. Yes, he said "red kids." The only thing that would have been better is if he had said "I'm not racist, because being racist is gay."

Oh yes, I forgot to mention Buttars long standing hatred of homosexuals. At one point he referred to one of his colleagues who is homosexual as "the gay." It could have been worse, he could have called him "the sodomite." I 'm sure that's what he was thinking.

The nice thing about Chris Buttars is that there is really no reason to start a petition, or go to the state capitol with pitch forks and torches, because he'll do it all himself. I figure that if he keeps making public statements every other day in about a month he will be emerging in China. And think of all of the slurs he can make then...

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

hey there you free speech phony, yeah right...YOU!!!and pull your pants up!!

you are a hypocrite liar who publicly preaches free speech (except when it is something with which you disagree)but who really hates open discourse.

let's see how stupid you people really are: (rules of the truly stupid souless morons):

1. anyone who might say, "hey, you have a black mark on your {record}{shirt} {soul}" is a racist devil to be destroyed.
If i say "that black mark on your record is one ugly baby" I should have my gonads removed by a team of man hating lesbian trasgendered half elf midgets with a speech impediment.

Pay attention to which media outlets are pumping up this story. These are the enemies of free speech.

2. Only black people can use the word "lynched", even if they live in Lynchberg, Tenn. or Lynchberg, Va. And they should be fired if they aren't black. All whites who are named Lynch must be sent to a concentration camp run by .... you get the idea.

3. If i say "white lie" I am a racist who must be destroyed, unless I am a homo, woman, oriental, indio, or....anything besides a white male.

This reminds me of the lynching of Don Imus. And that was concocted to discipline the talk show host roster to not speak ill of Hillary.

Seems this current operation is designed to derail buttars efforts (may god bless him) to stop the deviant marriage registry in slc.

Logical Libby said...

Um, okay.

You know, you kind of lose impact when you cut and paste the same response on any blog that mentions Chris Buttars. I found this exact same response on leftoutinutah.blogspot.com and polio.blogspot.com. Same bad capitalization and punctuation and all.

Anonymous said...

you bloggers seem to be acting like hypocrites.

you believe in free speech? I don't think so. You act like brown shirts.

Logical Libby said...

Okay, new rule here at LibbyLogic, if you do not have the guts to put your name on your comment, I am taking it down., End of story.

Michael Aaron said...

The (apparently) same "anonymous" is posting the same rant on every blog posted about Buttars. Don't take it personally. It seems the Utah Eagle Forum has taken to using hateful tactics. Oh wait - they always did that. Sorry.

Amanda said...

You evil blogger, quit speaking ill of Doug Henning. Dead men don't sell a lot of tickets (unless they are Keith Richards).

Amanda said...

PS - He's really Gayle Ruzicka in drag - or vice versa.

News said...

Hey Mrs. Buttars-- I mean "anonymous":

The dry cleaner called. Your sheets are ready.

Murphy Gilson said...

Actually, he's pretty damned funny. I do like the bit about the transgendered midgets. And I see his point... remember the guy who got in trouble for using the word "niggardly" because it sort of sounds like a racist word even though it is not in anyway ever, ever, ever associated with race?

I guess the whole issue could be avoided if people had better vocabularies and knew what more words and phrases meant.

See, um... "free speech" means that you have the right to say whatever you want - which this Butters guy did. Then other people have the right to say what you said is stupid - which in no way makes you either a "hypocrite" or a "liar"; two words the political right really need to look up in the dictionary.

Also while you're there, look up the word "liberal" because I don't think it means what you think it means.

Oh and check out "fascist" too. It doesn't apply at all in this case really, but you might just wanna be aware of it next time you wanna strip rights "given to us by our creator.