Five? Really?

I am, quite probably, the most faithful wife on the planet. I can honestly say that as long as I have been married I haven't thought about sleeping with anyone else, or even really found someone other than Ryan attractive. I mean, yes, I have looked at people and thought "oh, they're good looking," but I haven't wanted to throw my bra at them. Maybe it's because I did enough slutting around in my 20's (hi Mom!), or maybe it's because I am lazy and can't imagine the effort it must take to have an affair. In my opinion though, I think it's because my husband is one hot piece of ass, and he rocks my world like no other.

Wait, really, I have a point, and it's not to gross you out.

The fabulous Jules at Mean Girl Garage gave me this award, and despite my usual lukewarm feelings about such things, I decided to respond to it, first of all because she said I wouldn't, and second of all, because it features naked Barbies.

In my award acceptance speech I am supposed to name my five "freebies," or men* I would choose to sleep with if I could, and Ryan wouldn't get mad. Really though, if he's not going to get mad about me sleeping with someone else, he probably would be really okay with me checking into a hotel room by myself to watch cable, drink cheap wine, take long baths, and eat nothing but Cheeseburger Doritos for a weekend. Of course, after a couple hours I would get bored, and would want him to come up and bring Meg. She loves Doritos. And yes, I know that makes me Satan to all "organic" Moms.

Maybe they're the ones who really need to get laid... I wonder if every organic Mom has Keith Richards on her list, just to be bad.


*If I could turn back time, I would say Tony Curtis -- for all five. You know, when he was young, not now that he looks like this. I would post the actual picture on my blog, but it would make me too sad. Ryan is so lucky Tony isn't hot any more.