Tuesday, May 4, 2010

College Students Are Idiots

Every year the paper at the University of Utah allows the senior staff to write good-bye columns. Or at least, they did. They may want to rethink the practice after seeing this year's collection...
Oh, wait, they didn't stop there... I mean, just in case anyone thought it was an accident, or didn't get the joke.

Wow. I really hope that none of these writers were hoping to be remembered for their writing. I also hope none of them are hoping to work professionally as a journalist. I mean, yeah, we like to have fun -- behind the scenes. However, if there is one thing everyone in the business knows, it's that advertising pays the bills. And advertisers don't give money to papers and stations that employ douchebags who look to "South Park" for their standards.

Yeah, I know, I sound old and stodgy. I am sure that all of these kids think that potential employers (Gizmodo! Huffington Post! Icanhazcheeseburger!) will find their antics "edgy" and "fun." Yeah, they might. However, they still won't hire them, because they can't trust them.

Okay, rant over. Now I can laugh at it. I mean, did you see what it says?

19 comments:

She Said said...

Far be it from me to
Undermine the
Cleverness of these college
Kids

Live
In the moment. Sounds
Cliche? Wow,
Kids these days.

Boy, you think
All this is about
Living
Life
Sporadically?

Her said...

I can't read what they're saying, but if it's anything like my alma mater's paper, then ugh. I cringe every time I get a copy.

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

What a bunch of twits.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock said...

The part where you mentiond "ICanHazCheeseburger!" made me laugh uncontrollably.

At first I didn't get what you were going on about. Until, naturally, the word PENIS stood out to my dirty eye. And then it all fell into place.

Oh my.

LL Cool Joe said...

Unfortunately I can't comment because I can't read what they've written!

G said...

If the titles are any indication of their writing skills, then you can expect that when they have to write business correspondence, it will be pretty much like:

"Can u please tell me ? my paycheck is short? Thxs."

Jules said...

Well, Batman ISN'T the only one committed to solving crime. There's Wonder Woman, Spiderman, The Wonder Twins... The list goes on and on......

Eternally Distracted said...

I'm clearly going to have to go back and enlarge the pics!

Badass Geek said...

All I can say is AWESOME.

Logical Libby said...

Focus on the big letters... The actual text doesn't matter...

Sam said...

So...I'm guessing it's not a religious school.

BugginWord said...

*pointing and sniggering* Huh-huh. Cunt is still my favorite. Oh wait, that didn't come out quite right. TWSS. Seriously, somebody stop me.

Amanda said...

Wow, I am impressed - and beyond proud to be a graduate of said University.
Now wait, this comes from the same school that balked about Spring Awakening being held at Kingsbury Hall, due to it's subject matter. Stay classy San Dimas.

Scribe said...

I must be so angelic because it took me a minute to see it and then I sat there with my mouth agape.

Nice way to say farewell! In my last year of Journalism, we had the "Wall of Shame" for really bad headlines and cutlines that never made it into the paper. But at least they remained out of the paper. I'm feckin' speechless! (and that takes a lot... have you read my blog!?!)

Scribe

Summer said...

Good Lord! It doesn't surprise me though. My husband is an clinical instructor for three colleges. Their stupidity is boundless. Everyone loves to have fun, but there's a time where professionalism has to make an appearance. His students rarely get that either.

Amanda said...

See? College students, they just don't get it. They are so idealistic that they take journalism so SERIOUSLY, you know? like they think, oh I just read in class that I have free speech so I'm gonna go on and do it! but they don't realize that ETHICS is different. Just because you can doesn't mean you should.

bitethebedbugs said...

It's hard to know which title is worse. I sort of like the unabashed cleverness (and by cleverness, I mean moronicness) of "photo work put it all in perspective." I mean I kind of think there's nowhere to go but up for that guy.

Gina said...

Since none of them are MY kid, I'm going to go ahead and say HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

Rassles said...

I ain't no professional journalist, and I wish I could read their articles so I could properly make fun of them but my magnifying lense zoom thing is worthless and weak-willed.

Also, I think it's important to note that I am hilarious.