Monday, November 23, 2009

There Will Be Rolls

My family does not think I am a good cook. Probably because I am not. I mean sure, when I follow a recipe I can make things that are edible, but who really wants to follow a recipe? I am a free spirit, going where my culinary whims take me, and enjoying the results. The fact that other people can't enjoy them as well is not my problem. For instance, I will never believe that a grilled pretzel, butter, peanut butter, and cheese sandwich is not a taste treat. And I will not be ashamed that is the pinnacle of my cooking adventures.

While I am not ashamed of my cooking adventures, I am always a little hurt that they don't ask me to bring anything to family dinners. While my sisters and Mom divvy up the dishes, the answer when I ask what I can bring is always the same: wine. It doesn't matter if I have just perfected a recipe for roasted brussel sprouts and apples, or figured out a way to crust pork with Cheetos without making either mushy, they just want me to bring wine. Oh, unless I am working on wine recipes, then they say they just want my company.

This Thanksgiving though, they messed up. They asked me to bring rolls. And I am going to make this Thanksgiving all about bread.

You think I am just going to pick up a couple bags of rolls from the grocery store? You don't know me very well. I will be baking them myself. Oh, and I will not just be baking one kind. There will be white AND whole wheat. Oh, and there may even be buttermilk biscuits. Or maybe some type of "herbed" roll. Of course, none will actually shaped like rolls, or at least what you call "rolls." I see turkeys, and flowers, and Cloverfield aliens. Family members won't want to eat the rolls, because they will appear to be works of art, but they will have no choice, because they will be so delicious.

This year: rolls. Next year: the turkey. The turkey which will be stuffed with pretzels and Kraft singles. Victory will be mine.

9 comments:

Jules said...

I heart you! I have a belief that ALL things are better with pretzels!

You should just MAKE PRETZELS as the bread!!!!!

Vancouver real estate said...

I wish you good luck with rolls. I believe that they will be delicious. I remember those times when I started with cooking. Firstly, my results were not absolutely eatable but with the method of trial and error I have learned how to properly follow the recipe or even how to improve it. I think that everybody is able to learn how to cook it's just matter of time if it is sooner or later. Despite the fact that the Canadian Thanksgiving was few weeks ago I wish you Happy Thanksgiving.

Have a nice day,
Jay

Kim said...

You just posted my post dammit. That's what I get for going to bed without my lead helmet on. Brussel sprouts and apples-- what's wrong with you people from Utah????

just making my way said...

Brussel sprouts make me gag. They are the one vegetable I won't touch.

If you succeed in making a roll look like a Cloverfield alien I may have to move to Utah just to stalk you.

Aunt Juicebox said...

We do something different for T-day every year. Some years we go out, last year we were in Disney, some years my parents have dinner at their house, we've had it at ours. This year we're going to my SIL's house. I'm hoping we eat out because if she tries to cook, I'm killing myself.

Amanda said...

Sure - the one Thanksgiving food to which I do not have an extreme revulsion & you get to make them?!?!?!? I am just kidding - your rolls will be a highlight.

Kindra said...

i highly recommend the site http://www.thefreshloaf.com It is where I gained my know how when diving into the wonderful world of yeast. best of luck. I expect reviews and pictures!

Chief said...

good luck with the rolls. you might wanna buy some and have them in the trunk just in case ~wink

KAM said...

I love bread. Making it and eating it. I could never do a carb free diet, I think I would die. This year I am in charge of bread and sweet potato casserole, which I think should secretly be a dessert, so yummy, I just can't wait.