Resolved

I don't do New Year's resolutions. I think the last time I formally made one was New Year's 2006. I said I wasn't going to drink during the week. Of course, on New Year's Day that year I found out one of my best friends had been in a horrible accident, and two weeks later she died, and I spent the next three months almost constantly drunk. I really haven't had the heart to make a resolution since then.

It isn't that I don't need to make changes in my life, I do. After all, if I don't start working out again I am going to end up a gelatinous blob that doesn't have enough muscle tone to bend over and tie my shoes. I wear slip-ons most of the time, but that's beside the point. Also, my car is going to be classified as a Superfund site if I don't start cleaning it out regularly. So, I guess committing to going to the gym, or keeping trash bags in car would make excellent resolutions. The only problem is that I actually want to do these things, and making them resolutions almost certainly means I won't.

I think my reticence comes from the fact that I don't like taking orders from anyone, even myself. And New Year's resolutions feel less like great ideas, and more like demands. That makes me want to shake my little fist in rage. Also, I resent the fact that people want to know what your New Year's resolutions are. When I join Weight Watchers in March no one gives a damn. But do it on January first and everyone wants to know about it -- most likely to place bets on when I give up.

I guess I could be a smart ass about my dislike about New Year's resolutions, and say jerky things like "I resolved not to make any resolutions." Oh, that's really clever. Do you say you would wish for more wishes too? And who is your fifth grade teacher next year? Or I could resolve to do something easy -- like breathe. But no, I would do either. Instead, I will just raise a glass to toast the new year, and any changes I may intentionally, or unintentionally make over it's course. I mean, like sucking less at keeping up with my blog.

I wish you all a happy 2009. And I don't think any of you need to make any resolutions. You are perfect just the way you are... No, I'm not being sarcastic.