I don't know why, but lately I have been besieged by e-mail questionnaires sent to me by friends to "get to know me better." They are always forwards from someone else they know, and they include questions about nicknames, first pets, favorite foods and so on. I filled out the first few just because it seemed kitschy, but I refuse to fill out any more, and I am certainly not forwarding them on to other friends. I mean, if I wanted to know my friends better I would stay sober around them. Also, I don't think knowing the favorite childhood story of any of my friends bonds us closer. However, I have thought up some questions that, if answered, would actually be interesting to me. Answer them if you dare...
1. Do you prefer "bite me" or "shut it"?
2. What kind of underwear do you wear? If you don't wear any, what does it feel like when you're wearing jeans?
3. Describe one instance where you really thought you were going insane.
4. Name two people you would kill if you knew you wouldn't get caught.
5. Have you ever eaten anything out of the trash? What was it?
6. Name two people you've slept with you really wish you hadn't.
7. What is your favorite insulting name to use?
8. Have you ever pooped your pants? Was it in public?
9. If you could wipe one animal or insect off the planet, what would it be?
10. What should you have been doing while you were taking this quiz?
Okay, there you go. Send it to ten friends and a golden pony with rainbow hair will show up at your front door. If you don't evil dwarves will come to your house and knock stuff off your counters.
Saturday, September 22, 2007
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2 comments:
You asked for this, and because I am your sister's best friend it is my duty to fill this out....
1. Do you prefer "bite me" or "shut it"?
Actually I prefer "Piss off"
2. What kind of underwear do you wear? If you don't wear any, what does it feel like when you're wearing jeans?
Cotton low rise, 5 for 20$ at Vicki's Secret, inexpensive and not embarrassing if they show at work.
3. Describe one instance where you really thought you were going insane.
Every day between 16 and 30.
4. Name two people you would kill if you knew you wouldn't get caught.
Jeff and Jeff... odd, 2 totally different people same name.
5. Have you ever eaten anything out of the trash? What was it?
No not that I remember, but, there is still the future.
6. Name two people you've slept with you really wish you hadn't.
Jeff and Jeff, see question 4.
7. What is your favorite insulting name to use?
Poohead. and Asshat.
8. Have you ever pooped your pants? Was it in public?
Yes and Yes.... on the subway when I was 9.
9. If you could wipe one animal or insect off the planet, what would it be?
Earwigs, the bastards eat my dahlias.
10. What should you have been doing while you were taking this quiz?
Packing for my business trip to New Orleans.
I'm actually going to put this in my LiveJournal...
It will entertain me.
1. Do you prefer "bite me" or "shut it"? Shut the fuck up is currently my choice.
2. What kind of underwear do you wear? If you don't wear any, what does it feel like when you're wearing jeans? Cotton hipsters - I don't wear jeans - or pants for that matter.
3. Describe one instance where you really thought you were going insane. August 8, 1974 or November 26, 1979.
Actually, it was most likely right after Luke was born. No postpartum depression for me, nope - it was the postpartum crazies.
4. Name two people you would kill if you knew you wouldn't get caught.
Casshat is truly the only one I can think of.
However, knowing the weird allegiance I have with E-I above, I would most likely help with the Jeff eliminations.
5. Have you ever eaten anything out of the trash? What was it?
Nope
6. Name two people you've slept with you really wish you hadn't.
Since you are my sister & I know our mother will be reading this, I plead the fifth.
7. What is your favorite insulting name to use? Fucker
8. Have you ever pooped your pants? Was it in public? No & no
9. If you could wipe one animal or insect off the planet, what would it be? Earwigs!!
10. What should you have been doing while you were taking this quiz?
Working on my website (http://newspaceentertainment.com) - SHAMELESS PLUG!!!
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