Tuesday, May 22, 2007

I feel dirty

It has come to my attention that LibbyLogic is being censored. Yes, dear readers, it appears that the Jordan School District is blocking my site from those needing their dose of sarcastic ranting. Why, you may ask. They consider my site pornography. But, Libby, you must be saying, there is nothing pornographic about your site. I know, gentle reader, I think it is because i titled a previous post "The Bitch is Back." Either that or the full frontal nudity I have been including subliminally.

No matter what the reason I will not take this affront lightly. The gestapo like tactics of the Jordan District must stop! How are children ever going to grow into caustic young adults if they only exposed to proper websites and blogs -- like Fox News? So, what am I going to do? Am I going to stage a protest? March with a sign in front of every school in the district until my voice is heard? Write my Congressman and ask for help? Take this all the way to the Supreme Court? No, none of those. Instead, I am going to use the greatest weapon at my disposal -- my power or persuasion.

Reasons Why LibbyLogic is good for Children -- and America
  1. America needs to laugh. In these days of war, famine, global warming and NBC's crappy fall line-up who will bring redemption? The jesters. Especially the short, sarcastic ones with too much time on their hands.
  2. Increased vocabulary. I think we have all benefited from my grasp of the English language and how to manipulate it. Hello, "niceified" anyone? I'm also up on the latest slang. Kids can related to me when I say something was jammin' in the hiz-ouse.
  3. The war on drugs. If kids are happy and occupied reading LibbyLogic they have less time to uses drugs. And a hand on a mouse scrolling down the page is too busy to hold a crack pipe.
  4. Pictures of my dog. She is much cuter than any of those stupid kittens on Cuteoverload that the kids love. I bet that stupid site isn't blocked by the first amendment squashers at Jordan.
  5. Tips on being a better citizen. By letting the world know what annoys me -- and probably all forward thinking people in the world -- I give others the chance to better the world by stopping their bad behaviors early. For instance, people could reconsider their stupid do-gooder movements before they start.
There are thousands of other benefits of LibbyLogic I could highlight -- but most of them are strangely connected to the fact that I have a great rack. And that probably would just lead to more censorship. So, I will leave you with this to ponder -- if a blog is blocked by a school district and no one complains then what is the sound of one hand clapping? Deep, I know.


mom said...

It's blocked in the Salt Lake District, too. However, it isn't LibbyLogic, it's blogspot.

cate said...

I am very glad that someone is thinking of the innocent children of the Jordan District.

Amanda said...

As long as this does not lead to an entry about how Ryan punished you for being a "Bad, bad girl", I will support you in your moral outrage.

If it does, well, I might have to block you too....