I should be writing the "23 months" post tonight. I am not though, because tonight that certain 23 month old tried to kill me.
It was a pretty good day. She played with Grandma and Aunt Cate and Luke. She went to Little Gym. She ate fruit snacks and got stickers and hand stamps. She should have been happy!
Then? Just as we were pulling into the driveway at 5:00pm she fell asleep. When she awoke, the demon came out.
The dinosaur is scared of Meg.
First she wanted a snack. Not just any snack though, a rice krispie treat. I countered with fruit leather. She countered with throwing herself on the floor and kicking the fridge.
She wanted to draw. Then she wanted to eat the markers. I said she could draw, but not eat the markers. She threw herself out of her seat and onto the floor.
Realizing I could not make dinner without her lighting the house on fire I took her to the neighborhood Thai place. I ordered all her favorite stuff -- rice and pot stickers. When the food arrived I stuffed as much as I could in her mouth, and then tried to eat myself. She then UNBUCKLED the high chair and stood up. I put her in a chair. She got down. I put her on my lap. She tried to pull my shirt down. I put her on the floor. She tried to run out the door. Finally, holding her arm as she screamed and kicked in circles "Three Stooges" style on the floor, I signed the check and took the boxed up food.
Bath time was okay. I had wine and she pretended to be Mark Spitz. By that I mean she spit water at me.
After bath, I was putting lotion on her skin and hair. She asked for some, so I put it in her hand knowing she normally rubs it on her belly. She put it right in my eye. For a non-allergenic lotion Cetaphil burns like a motherfucker.
The worst part of all of this? Was every time she pissed me off, she would do something to make me laugh. At one point I actually said "stop making me laugh, I'm mad." Her response? "Laugh, Mama."
She does make me laugh.
I will tell you all about it in the "23 months" post this weekend. That is, if she lets me live.
I still love my girl.