Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Turkey Trot Terror

Meg and I were almost killed today by a turkey.

Totally not lying.

We were at the zoo, waving to the monkeys and telling the giraffes we loved them, singing songs of joy and love, and wishing our fellow living beings well, when all of a sudden, this big turkey stepped out into the path.

I could tell he was ready for a fight.

Meg clapped her hands, like she does with the turkeys at the farm to make them gobble. But this was no farm turkey, and he would only be gobbling for blood.

We took a step forward. He took a step forward. We faked to the left. He followed us. I asked him what the hell was his problem. He didn't answer because he's a turkey.

Finally, I just took off running, pushing the stroller with all the might my spaghetti arms could handle. We ran right past him as he ruffled his feathers, finally gave a gobble, and Meg screamed with glee.

When we turned around he was still mad, but his little bird brain had forgotten all about the fact we were the ones he was mad at. And there was another family coming up the path. A menacing looking family.

We didn't even stick around to see what happened. I figure next time if we see the turkey with a black arm band we will know.


Anonymous said...

What is going on that these feathered madmen are making a power grab for the days of glory?
I'm done with birds.

Riot Kitty said...


Anonymous said...

That is one scary-ass bird.

Amanda said...

What is it with you & animals?

Mandy_Fish said...


You're a turkey menace.

Jen said...

LMAO! Glad you both survived it.

The Vegetable Assassin said...

That turkey's out to avenge all turkey's for Thanksgiving. Or he's a she with PMS, either way, yikes! :)

manders said...

ugh, birds freak me out. it goes without saying that the bigger and uglier the bird, the more it'll freak me out. i tried to put on a brave face when the peacocks walked near my (not quite 2 yr old) niece and i at the zoo, but i definitely would have lost it with that turkey incident!

Gina said...

Many years ago, I was attacked by a goose. I was at a waterpark & was talking on the pay phone (remember those?) and a fucking goose ran up and started pecking me. I ran, because geese are mean assholes, and it chased me. I guarantee someone, somewhere has a video of this. If they win money with it, I'm cutting a bitch.