Ryan and I had our first game the other night at the zoo. The weather was warm, the animals were out and playing, and some parents just couldn't tell their kids enough how horrible they are.
All through the zoo we had two prime contenders. One had a child named Mason. We know his name was Mason because she would scream it every time she would push him and tell him to "hurry up.'' Seriously, you would have thought Mason was cattle the way she was prodding him. I guess she had a definite schedule of animal viewing, and no one was going to mess that up for her.
I have no idea what the kids of the other Mom were named, because she only called them all "you." I guess when you have five under seven that happens. "You," she would say "stop making that face. You're making the picture ugly. I don't know why I even take pictures of you." A short time later we heard her say "hey, you, if you don't hurry up I am leaving you here and the animals will probably eat you." No, that is a great way to make sure a kid will love the zoo forever.
All throughout the zoo these two top contenders battled. The "you" Mom would say something totally disheartening that could scar a child for life, but then Mason's Mom would push him so hard we thought for sure he was about to take a tumble. It was a REALLY close race, sure to be a photo finish.
Then a dark horse pulled ahead.
A young couple that had been making the rounds in the zoo with us, not making a peep except to coo over their probably nine month old son, held him over the rail in the giraffe house, 16 feet above a concrete floor, to get a picture of him with the animal. I don't know who looked more shocked: the endangered child, or the giraffe who was wondering if this was some kind of chubby new treat.
Mason's Mom and the "You" Mom faded into the background. We had a winner.
I'm actually hoping that we run into them again. Maybe at the aviary, or the race track. I have a feeling they could make this the best stellar parenting season ever.