Dear person who keeps leaving the Book of Mormon on my desk,
Knock it off.
Five times now I have come into the office to find the book on my desk. Five times now I have moved it, telling everyone around me it is a spare copy that landed on my desk the first time by happenstance, and that it is up for grabs. Five times now I have moved it off my desk.
I do not want to do any of this a sixth time.
If you are trying to get me to read the book, just know that I already have. I've lived in Utah my whole life, do you really think I've gone this long without reading it? Don't worry, if I suddenly decide to convert, I'm sure I will be able to find another copy.
If you are doing this as a joke, please know I'm not laughing. Once again, this is Utah, so my office has lots of Mormons. If it looks like I'm making light of their religious beliefs, that could mean trouble for me. I have enough trouble at the office as it is, and I like being able to pay my bills. So, let's find something else to joke about -- like Republicans. Wait, no, not Republicans, that wouldn't go over well either. How about puppies?
Is it a deal?
I have a book you can swear on to make it official...