Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Makes a Wipe Warmer Look Essential

Ladies and gentlemen, I have done it.

I have found the most ridiculous, unnecessary, single use baby product on the market. Oh, and of course, it is touted as the one thing no parent should be without.

I give you, the juppy:


No, that is not a reusable shopping bag with holes cut in it. I mean, I'm sure it was at some point, but now it is a revolutionary baby walking system, that can be yours for just 40 dollars! You aren't using that money for something else, are you?

I just don't see why anyone would want to buy something that removes them from really interacting with their child at a key developmental stage. I am well aware that, since becoming a mother, I have become much softer. I mean, I hardly ever put cats in trash cans for no reason any more. So, maybe that's it. Really, though, I think it's that I cannot imagine any greater pleasure right now than holding Meg's pudgy little hands while she tries to walk on her own. I love how that grasp helps me tell where she is getting stronger, and where she still needs help. I love how when my back gets tired I can tell it's probably time to give her little legs a break, since she is working much harder than I am. I love that she still is my baby, and am holding onto that feeling as long as I can.

Why would I trade that for a sack? Even one that is approved by "doctors?"

Also, the name just pisses me off. Juppy? Is is half jumpy half puppy?

I am sure there is someone out there, perhaps even reading this, who recommends the "Juppy" to everyone, telling them it is something no parent should live without. You know, kind of like how other parents say they can't do without those leash things, or how I recommend not living far from a liquor store. And maybe the "Juppy" parents are better off. After all, in the end they can sew up the legs, and make their money back by getting five cents off at the grocery store every time they refuse to use paper or plastic...

Yeah, I'm still not buying one.

16 comments:

Riot Kitty said...

OK that is just WEIRD. Some people will blow money on anything!

mylittlebecky said...

that is just hysterical. they should've named it baby marionettes! then you could dress them up and do puppet shows! oo! i want one! wonder if they work on dogs...

BugginWord said...

Well this is embarrassing. I've been wearing mine as a sassy summer cap!

Amanda said...

Why are you hatin' on the wipe warmer?? When Luke was in diapers, I was a total devotee to the wipe warmer - it was much preferred over my initial action of keeping the wipes in the fridge.

Waiting Lisa said...

Haha, nothing surprises me anymore.

Sam said...

I still think that thing they tried to sell me when I registered at Babies R Us where you put "meat" or "fruit" into a mesh bag they can suck on is more useless, and definitely more disgusting.

After they described its wonders, I said "Excuse me, I just threw up in my mouth a little."

Mary Anne Mohanraj said...

I like the little mesh bags. We put ice cubes in when they were teething. It helped!

Gina said...

There are so many unnecessary baby products out there. But they sell, because sleeplessness and screaming kids make up CRAZY.

Kelly said...

That is weird, it is about as weird as that boob pillow seperator thing a mig you shared with us a while back...it's amazing all the crap you can find on the interwebs.

My sister and I are going to get my dad this fancy hair organizer for Christmas...check it out.

http://www.draplin.com/1998/01/ddc035_ddc_hair_organizer.html

Kelly said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Her said...

Once again, your timing is impeccable. I'm putting together my registry and I just *knew* something was missing.

Jules said...

My sister spent HOURS in that jumper thing... She loved it. Hated the swing, loved the jumper. Got me.....She doesn't do a lot of jumping now that she's 20 though....

Lisa Page Rosenberg said...

Can I get a volunteer to drag me around in one of those? Does it have a cup holder for my travel coffee mug?

justmakingourway said...

I still think the "jean" diapers are worse. Slightly. Thismuch.

Juppy is a terrible, terrible name.

I love that you find these products. They make me laugh and laugh.

FabuLeslie said...

I think it would be awesome for people who are having babies when they are 50 years old... it's probably much harder on their backs than yours to bend way over like that. Hee hee. Yes, the juppy is ridiculous. I'm so with you on this!

Hippo Brigade said...

HAA!! The Juppy. That's amazing.
Their slogan must be, "Because holding your baby's hands as he walks is too much work."