Wednesday, June 10, 2009

The Source of ADHD


I have taken the advice of Sandi and others and begun to nest, getting ready for the baby that could arrive on our doorstep any day now. Friends have helped us put together a registry, telling us all the things we "must have" and for the most part we have followed their advice to the letter. We know the baby will need a place to sleep (other than a drawer), clothes to wear, a car seat for safety, and bottles for eating. We've picked out
blankets, and bathtubs, bumpers, bouncers, boppies, binkies, and other things with ridiculous names. In fact, only once have we balked at a so-called "must have": the exersaucer. You know, this thing...



I'm sorry, but that looks more like a Mardi Gras float than a baby essential. I am really worried that if we get one of these things and I am able to nurse (a post for another time), my child will hand me beads every time it's time to feed.

I mean, I know that bright colors help stimulate a baby's mind, but can't we do that while also stimulating their sense of style? Also, does it have to be the size of a Yugo? Ryan and I live in a home with about 1000 square feet of livable space. This will take up at least 50 of it. We might have to replace the sofa.

Oh, and all of them make noise! Like the thing isn't calling enough attention to itself, so there have to be frog croaks and annoying nursery rhyme songs emitting from it all day. You know, when I was a child the majority of toys were silent, and those with sound were powered by rubber squeakers. So, why do all baby items now have to come with their own sound systems?

I just don't think we can do it. Well, maybe if Sally can chew on it. Then it's a multi-tasker...

16 comments:

Snotty McSnotterson said...

The problem being: when you are tired, ragged, sick of making a thousand baby noises, weak from holding a wee one all the time, and needing any kind of respite at all ANY KIND AT ALL... well, this loud ugly shit comes in handy. Don't buy it until you feel you need it - I lasted six months.

LB @Wait, She Said What? said...

Awesome point! However, I know from friends and family that anything that can distract a baby for a few moments to provide a moment to sit, pee, shower or breathe is a "must have" item.

You should look at those jumping swing things that hang from a door jam to the floor so baby can bounce with it's legs. Nothing like giving a toy made for whiplash. Lol. No, seriously it's a real thing and I've heard babies are a big fan.

May your baby be on his or her way very very soon!

Sandi said...

That picture you posted, is Ellie's favorite toy! She LOVES it.

I nursed some of my adopted babies. Call me and we can chat about it.

Yellow Trash Diaries said...

1. You will have to sell all your shit to make room for all the baby's things (Elmo and his entourage)

2. You will set the cat on fire to entertain the baby. If you don't have a cat use the neighbor's and kill two birds with one stone.

Emily-Ione said...

Um, where does the baby go in it? Or does the child just get woven in among the accouterments?

I win again for anti spam words - "Logroll"....

really I'm not making these up. I'm just that lucky.

Karlyn said...

Having two kidlets myself....you can do without the exersaucer, however the door swing jumpy thing is good, and we loved the swing. As a rule dh and I never had the big gawdy toys, we are way too anal....

And another thing...I don't want to sound like a Breastfeeding Nazi, but you can ABSOLUTELY breastfeed your baby. It sounds like Sandi will be a fabulous person to turn to with this situation. As a certified Doula, I have seen it done a number of times.

Ellen said...

the thing we loved the most was the little bouncy chair with the things dangling overhead. cash spent hours in that thing. we just got a cheaper version of this:

http://tinyurl.com/nkxwup

i'm getting soooo excited for you guys!

Joanna Jenkins said...

I agree! Get something that bounces! You will thank the lord you did!

Chelsea Talks Smack said...

Just looking at that thing stresses me out.

DC Diva said...

You don't HAVE to get an exersaucer but you really really want to get something that safely contains the baby while you pee/sit/shower/breathe. A swing is our contraption of choice (although we have an exersaucer too... they grow out of the swing pretty quick). A papasan is great, so is a traveling swing. Anything you can strap them in and they stay put and entertained...

Cate said...

I am going to buy baby Hoglund every toy possible that makes noise.

Amanda said...

I feel it is my duty as an aunt to get Baby H toys with noise - and the CATS soundtrack.

Captain Dumbass said...

They do keep your kid distracted, but they're still evil. They eat up sooo much space and there is no where to put them that they're not in the way. Oh, and wait until you run into it in the middle of the night and all it's little bells and whistles start going off.

Dana's Brain said...

Ah, the exosaucer. We did love ours - well, the kids did. I concur that it was a good place for them to go when I just needed a break.

But Captain D is correct, they do take up a lot of room. Of course, all their shit takes up a lot of room. So really, you're doomed either way!

Lana said...

i have this EXACT saucer in my 700 sq ft apt for my 8 month old. i thank the makers of this monstrous eyesore profusely every time my little troublemaker plays contentedly for a half hour in this piece.

Dunc said...

I just had a conversation with a friend about adoptive parents nursing, so I will be waiting with bated breath for that "post for another time." The conversation was more in the context of keeping babies/children alive if you are stuck in the wilderness, though....which I'm thinking is not the same scenario as yours :-)