Twitterpated

Is Libby Logic just not enough for you? Do you want to know what I am thinking every second of the day? Well, then Christmas has come early, because I have just found Twitter.

Now, when I first heard about Twitter I shunned it. It sounded like yet another MySpace, Friendster, LinkedIn bullshit thing. I hate those things. If I want someone to be my friend I will go to dinner with them, not add a three year old, well photo shopped picture of them to a list. However, then I discovered something about Twitter that is unlike the other "networking" sites that makes it not suck -- it doesn't smack of effort. You just type in short answers to the question "what are you doing" and then send it to everyone who cares. It's a revelation.

No longer will I have to agonize on how to craft a long blog post around one funny thing Luke said. No longer will people have to wonder if I am having pizza or pasta for dinner. I can document every moment of my life without really saying anything at all! And I won't have to actually pretend to care about my friends to find out what they are doing. Phone calls? Done. Visits? Done. As long as I get a hundred characters a day from them I will consider my job as a buddy done. And it will all be for your reading pleasure.

I am sure there are some of you out there saying "isn't this a little self indulgent and vain?" Well, yes, it is. So what? Haven't you realized yet that life in America is all about finding meaning in nothing and over analyzing everything we do? We have no natural predators. We are well fed and filled with ennui. Our only contributions to the world now are political bullying and Internet videos. And I am happy to be a part.

Let the navel gazing begin.