Nader!

It's official: I am pissed off at Ralph Nader.

Over the weekend Nader announced he will run for President as a third party candidate. Does he think he can win? No. Does he care? No. He claims that none of this matters though, saying that he feels the front runners in both the Democratic and Republican races aren't addressing issues that matter to the people. Like what, Ralph? Crazy old men who have the need to make public spectacles of themselves to feel relevant? I think John McCain has that one covered.

If Nader doesn't think this Presidential bid is a bad idea maybe he should look at who has welcomed him into the race: Mike Huckabee. Yes, the man who should scare any reasonable person enough they feel they need to check for him in their closets at night thinks it's a great thing Nader has joined the race. I would elaborate, but I don't think I need to.

It's like Nader has completely forgotten about the 2000 election. I don't care what anyone says or how may pie charts they show me, Nader won that election for George Bush. Nader says that likely wouldn't happen again, and that "if the Democrats can't landslide the Republicans this year, they ought to just wrap up, close down, emerge in a different form." Yeah, that's great Ralph, but you have forgotten one thing -- DEMOCRATS LOVE TO LOSE! Do you really think that George Bush should have beaten Al Gore? Or that he should have served a second term after turning the U-S into the most hated nation in the world with a record deficit? No! And while a lot of that is Americans being stupid, even more is the fact that Democrats love to in-fight, and flip flop and tear each other down. Also, because the Democratic party has a lot of young people. Young people, as we know, are flighty. As a former young person myself I know this to be true. They don't think about the long term, they think about what's cool right now. Why do you think so many have lower back tattoos? They will vote for Nader, if for no other reason than he's different, and the cute guy in their sociology class is wearing a t-shirt with his name on it. Yes, there is a chance the young people will forget to vote unless they write reminders on their hands with sharpies, but that isn't a chance I want to take.

So, as of this morning I am no longer talking to Ralph Nader. Don't call, don't write, don't try to text me, Ralph -- until you drop out of the race you are Persona non Grata in my eyes. I won't even view the You Tube videos you send to all your friends. I don't care how cute the sneezing panda is, Ralph, until you drop out I won't watch it! Of course, when you do come to your senses you can come over for Indian food. I'll even cook it using solar energy.